Infestation (2009)

"This movie delivers the cheesy b-movie goods. Whodathunkit?"


INFESTATION
Sub-Genre- Horror comedy/Insect horror

In Attendance- Me and Machine.

Cast Members of Note- Christopher Marquette, Brooke Nevin, Kinsey Packard, and the always cool Ray Wise.

What's it About?- A geeky telemarketing slacker wakes up in a sticky cocoon to find his office overrun with giant beetles. Through his use of keen investigation skills, he discovers that the entire city is pretty much the same way, cocooned and under insect siege.

That goes way beyond web-eye.

He rescues some people from their cocoons, makes them vomit, and together they set out to survive. Luckily for him, one of the people he rescues is a really hot chick with super big boobs... or maybe it's just lucky for the audience. I'd like to think that were all lucky, and better off for having had her boobs around.

Thank you for your boobs. Thank you.

Soon enough they discover that the beetles are infusing themselves with humans, creating some creepy looking hybrid humeetle creatures. The humeetle's aren't very human at all though, and are willing to kill and cocoon even their loved ones for the betterment of the hive. Where did they come from, and why are they so angry at us?

Humeetle.

I won't spoil what happens here next, but suffice it to say that amid all of the snarky laughter, some creepy stuff goes down, people die, bugs get squished left and right, we get some gratuitous nudity, and the ending will leave you screaming at your TV because it never happens. Confused? So was I!

"What happened?!?"

The Good- Infestation was a really fun movie. I had my reservations at first, especially when our very own Machine warned me that it was a Syfy movie, but those fears were quickly put to rest as the movie wore on. Funny, gross, and fun, Infestation is a great way to spend 90 minutes. It had an old school b-movie feel to it, and I'd love to see a sequel.

Christopher Marquette absolutely carries this movie, and does a great job. The kid has comic timing down, and he brings an already good script to life admirably. Ray Wise was great as always too, so good that he even made me miss Twin Peaks. Overall, not a bad actor in the bunch here, which is truly rare for cheesy horror flicks.

The Bad- Again, the dog falls victim to the menace in a horror movie! Other than Dog Soldiers, I can't remember watching a horror movie recently where the dog doesn't die a horrible death, or in this case, become a John Carpenter-looking mutoid monster.

Poor little pooch!

The Downright Horrendous- What happened at the end? Seriously, there had better be a sequel on the way, because I am unfulfilled.

The Gory- Excessive vomit, various impalings, bug on human violence, human on human violence, shotgun violence, and all kinds of squished bugs... Grossness abounds in this movie.

The Naked- We actually get to see a pair of boobs; not the boobs I really wanted to see mind you, but they were still pretty nice.

"Good god woman, let them breathe!"

Best Line- "Let me tell you a little story... you're an idiot!" I LOL'd.

What did we learn?
- Beetles are filled with yogurt. Also, humeetles scream really loud.

Rating- B+ ( 8.5/10) This is a fun little movie that had me laughing the whole time and never got boring or lame. This is NOT a Syfy channel movie, it just happened to premiere on TV is all, so don't let that dissuade you from seeing it. Grab a copy whenever you get the chance, and sit back and enjoy.

Final Thoughts-
Deleted scene, or just a part of a crazy dream I had involving Brooke Nevin, a balance beam, a plunger, and a gimp mask? I'll leave you to decide for yourselves.


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