ZOMBIELAND
Sub-Genre- Zombie
In Attendance- Me
Cast Members of Note- Jesse Eisenberg, Woody Harrelson, Emma Stone, Abigail Breslin, and Amber Heard.
What's it About?- Mad cow disease finally destroys humanity, in the form of a gas station hamburger, and turns most everyone into stark raving mad-cow zombies! This begs the question of who would eat a hamburger at a gas station? I mean really? Anyway, the zombie apocalypse ensues, which includes ninja zombies, robot zombies, and flaming zombies!
Alive and on the run in the world-turned-zombie, Columbus, a nerdy World of Warcraft virgin-geek, meets up with Tallahassee, a bad ass southern ass kicker who likes to kick zombie ass for fun, and the two set off on a mission to find some Twinkies. After finding nothing other than a truck full of Sno-balls, they are hijacked and robbed by two chicks (Wichita and Little Rock), twice, and somehow end up meeting Bill Murray.
I won't spoil what happens from here on out, because basically there's nothing to spoil. They spend the movie fighting zombies on a mission to reach some amusement park in California. Will Columbus ever get laid? Will Wichita learn to love again? Will Tallahassee ever find a friggin' Twinkie? Not if the zombie clown has anything to say about it!
The Good- I have one thing to say, and one thing only: any movie that plays For Whom the Bell Tolls over the opening credits is aces in my book. Ok I lied, I have more to say... This movie is fun as hell and, aside from the annoying actions of the main chicks throughout most of the movie, is easily one of the best of the year.
Woody Harrelson is brilliant as Tallahassee, the zombie-ass kicking southern boy with a penchant for awesome one liners. I mean no disservice to the other actors in the movie, but he carried this one on his back, and even pressed it over his head a few times. Everyone else performed admirably too, but Woody definitely stole the thunder.
And what a stroke of genius that Bill Murray cameo was. "Maybe Garfield." It's the little things like that cameo, the twinkie sub plot, and the rules that made this move a breath of fresh air. Clever, funny, well written, acted... just great all the way around.
On a sad note, 406 got 86'd way too quickly. I'm a firm believer that what the world so desperately needs right now is more Amber Heard, and to see her cameo not be a leading role... well at least we had a short while together.
The Bad- I would have shot the snotty little grifter bitches. Sure, I may have missed out on some eventual romance, and maybe they're good people who are just scared and overly defensive, but screw that, no chick pulls a gun on me and lives! Unless it's Amber Heard. That'd be ok.
The Downright Horrendous- How annoyingly stupid were the chicks in the movie? Ditching the guys and running off alone, when they couldn't survive on their own, and turning on an amusement park at night... creating a MASSIVE beacon for zombies? Then, jump out of your car and get on a ride that strands you 300 feet in the air because it's safe? Zombies can climb, dummies!
The Gory- Plenty of typical zombie movie violence and gore to be had here, though it was nothing insanely over the top. A lot of the kills were clever and even funny, and should satisfy anyone needing a messy zombie death fix..
The Naked- Nope, and what a waste of
Best Line- "You wanna feel how hard I can punch?" or "Double Tap." I LOL'd every time.
What did we learn?- Bill Murray is awesome. Also, chicks cannot survive without men... this movie more than proved that theory!
Rating- A (9.5/10) This is a wickedly fun movie that all of us as horror fans need to see on the big screen. As horror comedies go (especially of the zombie variety), dare I say this is better than Shaun of the Dead? That's totally up for debate but it is absolutely as good, if different, and I can only pray that we get a sequel at some point. See it, and if you already have, see it again.
Final Thoughts- Emma stone is hot in a cutie pie kinda way.
