You didn't think it would all be fun and games, did you? With the good we must take the bad, and this decade gave us plenty of the bad ones to take... and yes, it absolutely hurt to take them.
Let's see how pissed off The Master is after watching these Train Wrecks... and yes, there are 31 movies worse than these ahead...
The Master says: "Anaconda 3: Offspring- As if another giant rubber snake movie wasn't bad enough, we're supposed to accept one with David Hasselhoff as the hero? I thought that seeing him wrestle a cheeseburger in a drunken rage was sad enough, but this tops even that. And who was the genius that greenlit American Psycho 2? Let's take the whiny chick from That 70's Show and shit all over the brilliance that was American Psycho! I should drain them of their blood for such an insult!"
The Master says: "Steven Seagal being fat and walking around for his 20 minutes of screen time earns him top billing in Against the Dark? He's so out of shape that his actions scenes are off screen even when he's on screen. "I'm going hunting!" Yeah, probably for another ham. Or some cake. And Bad Biology... don't get me started. Killer vagina and mutant penis fall in love... and then hump each other to death... and the penis runs away at the end! Seriously."
The Master says: "Fear Dot Com... how about Fear Dot Suck? Moving on... How could they make a sequel to Return of the Living Dead, one of the best zombie movies ever, and turn it into such an absolute crap-fest of a joke? Rave to the Grave? I have an idea, why don't you hold a rave in my 2000 year old ass.
