CHRISTINE
Sub-Genre- Killer car
In Attendance- Me, Eryn, The Vanilla Gorilla, and Nick.
Cast Members of Note- Keith Gordon, John Stockwell, Alexandra Paul, Kelly Preston, Robert Prosky, Harry Dean Stanton, And John Travolta's evil doppelganger..
What's it About?- Christine tells the story of Arnie; a hopeless loser that falls in love with his car, and then suddenly becomes all kinds of cool. I remember being in love with my big wheel when I was a kid, but it never made me cool... in fact, every time I got caught making love to "Gretchen" (That's what I called her), people would beat me up and/or run away crying.
The deeper in love that Arnie falls with his Plymouth Fury, the more problems start to occur; his hotter-than-he-deserves girlfriend dumps him, his best friend ends up in the hospital nearly paralyzed, and people start turning up dead... oh yeah, Christine is a car that kills people, I forgot to mention that. Not even John Travolta's evil, musclebound doppelganger can survive the fury of the Fury.
Will Christine kill everyone that gets in her way? Will Arnie and Christine ever be left alone to love each other? Does Harry Dean Stanton look exactly the same in this movie as he does today?
I wont spoil what comes next here, but suffice it to say that love hurts... it burns sometimes too. Sometimes it bleeds... rips... needs stitches... makes you cry yourself to sleep at night...
The Good- I hadn't seen this one in forever, and watching it again just made me remember what a great writer Stephen King is, and what a great filmmaker John Carpenter is. I mean, it's a movie about a killer car... that in and of itself sounds laughable, and yet both the story and the movie are fantastic.
Not only is this one of John Carpenter's best movies, one of Stephen King's best stories, but the list of great character actors in this thing is insane. Most importantly, Kelly Preston looks awesome here, as does Alexandra Paul. Oh, and John Carpenter was a master at scoring his films too; his scores were some of the best I've ever heard.
The Bad- Does Stephen King have to use oldies in all of his stories/movies? Sorry, I just can't stand oldies. Maybe try some 80's music or something, like Wham or Flock of Seagulls; now that's music.
The Downright Horrendous- Man on car love is just wrong, especially when you have hot girlfriend. Then again, maybe if you got her and the car together and had some drinks, that dream threesome just might happen...
The Gory- Very little gore, but plenty of violence.
The Naked- No... this 80's movie did not deliver to us the T&A. What a shame too, because Alexandra Paul got naked in all kinds of movies during her career. She had an identical twin too.
Best Line- "Okay... Show Me."
What did we learn?- Above all else, it's always Bro's before Ho's; because the ho's will kill you man, even if the ho is a car. Also, King and Carpenter rule.
Rating- A (9.5/10) This is an all-time classic. It's not even one of Carpenter's top 5 films and he absolutely nails it, giving us a believable and effective haunted car story. Own it if you don't already, it's a must for any horror collection.
The Vanilla Gorilla Says- "Possessed or not, if someone did that to my car, there would be some serious ass whipping's handed out." He's always so angry.
