AUDITION (Odishon)
Sub-Genre- J-Horror
In Attendance- Me, Eryn, Machine
Cast Members of Note- The always awesome Ryo Ibiashi, and the beautiful yet creepy Eihi Shiina. Directed by the incomparable Takashi Miike.
What's it About?- Aoyama is a recently widowed film producer/dad that really wants to get laid, so naturally he does what any film producer worth their salt would do; he turns to the casting couch to find some young, dumb chicks to snork. It's not abuse of power people, it's utilizing your resources to the fullest.
After slogging through a bunch of un-shaggable chicks, he eventually meets Asami, a sweet, hot and creepy little slip of a woman, and zero's in on her for the kill. She seems to take a liking to him immediately, and despite his co-workers warning of "She creeps me out", Aoyama takes full advantage of her.
All seems to be going well between them at first, including (but not limited to) nice dinners, talk of loving each other, weekend trips... but too bad Asami is insane. When Aoyama makes the mistake of not calling her for a few days, she wigs out and unleashes upon him things that no man deserves to have done to them.
The Good- This is an exercise in master film making, plain and simple. Miike is one of those director's like David Lynch in that he is completely "out there" with his narrative, but he always has a point, and drives it home with resoundingly uncomfortable violence and imagery.
To say that this movie is brutal is an understatement. I can see some "Hardcore" horror fans saying that they've seen tougher, and that nothing bothers them, but those guys are mostly tools. I've seen worse too, but this movie is definitely at the top of the list as far as uncomfortable movie experiences go.
It's interesting that for the most part, the first 2/3 of this movie is essentially a drama; maybe a hint of what to come can be seen here and there, but Miike plays it straight... until the third act when he swings his "mighty hammer of WTF?!?" and knocks the wind right out of us.
The Bad- I know dating is tough, but you have to learn to trust a little bit more, Asami. Sure you were abused when you were seven, and sure guys sleep with you and never call back, but that doesn't give you the right to give up on love!
The Downright Horrendous- Why always the dog! Can't someone kill a fucking parakeet or something? God!
The Gory- Oh yeah, this movie has plenty of disturbing and nasty stuff in it to leave you wanting no more. Needle torture, wire torture, vomit eating, decapitated corpses, dog violence... Not for even the remotely squeamish.
The Naked- No nakie nakie.
Best Line- "Kiri kiri kiri kiri kiri kiri!" One of the most disturbing lines/sounds I've ever heard, in any movie. Ever.
What did we learn?- Women are insane. Also, Takashi Miike is insane. (Brilliant too.)
Rating- A+ (10/10) This is a fantastic film that will stay with you long after you watch it. It's beautiful, painful, and in some parts, nauseating. This deserves to be in ever horror collection, and if you haven't seen it yet, you're truly missing one of the more recent genre classics.
Final Thoughts- All hail Takashi Miike, a true master of horror cinema.
